Job Application
This is a job application of a boy.
Please read it.
It's so hilarious.
This
kid will go far!! 
This is an actual job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted
at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida........and they hired him
because he was so honest and funny!
NAME: Greg Bulmash
SEX: Not yet.
Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice
President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a
position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the firstplace.
DESIRED
SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we
can haggle.
EDUCATION:
Yes.
LAST
POSITION HELD: Target for middle management
hostility.
SALARY:
Less than I'm worth.
MOST
NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
AVAILABLE
TO WORK: Of course! That's what I'm applying.
PREFERRED
HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday,Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO
YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to
a more intimate environment.
MAY
WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If
I had one, would I be here?
DO
YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO
50 LBS?: Of
what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
HAVE
YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?:
I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.
DO
YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no; on my breaks, yes.
WHAT
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas
with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the
greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that
now.
DO
YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?:
Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries.
Sometimes
being honest and funny doesn't hurt. It actually gets you attention!
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CuteFun.com for more! 
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